Humility, on the rocks

Posted by admin on Apr 14, 2010 in Academy | 0 comments

Climbing is first and foremost humbling. I know I am not experienced. I know I am not physically in shape enough to climb well. I feel awkward on easy climbs and often feel ungraceful and outdone by other climbers. I am at the mercy of nature. At any minute I could fall in my pride to my death. The rope is a lifeline, a saviour. There is a belayer. It is only through his hands that the grace of the rope is able to exist at all.

The last climb I attempted, I was tired and cold. My technique was sloppy and I was groping everywhere for any hold I could find. I reached up for the next hold, pulled my left leg up slightly higher and all of a sudden my footing was gone and my hands supported all of my weight. My arms gave out. I fell. The rope caught me quickly and I hung there in grace. I looked down. The belayer was offering suggestions and encouragement to continue. He had climbed that climb directly before me and knew the route. I wanted to be lowered, having decided already that I wouldn’t make it.

“You can do it Josh,” came the voice attached to the rope below. “You had good foot placement on your right. Just try and get your left foot up a bit higher.”

I hated him.

I fell twice more. That was enough. But the stubborn encouragement continued. Somehow I started to believe that maybe, if I gave it one more shot, I could do it. After hanging for some time in the grace of the rope I felt stronger, more able to accomplish what I had set out to do.

I regained my footing and started up again. My hands were slipping. I swung my left foot up and around awkwardly in a last ditch effort. It held. I pushed up and grabbed onto a new hold. I was there. I reached a position of rest and was able to move on—but how? Perhaps it was the renewed determination, perhaps the belayer snuck in a bit more tension to the rope to give me the boost I needed. I was over it though. Crux one had been passed.

My spiritual journey is at a similar level to my climbing experience. Though my relationship with God is nothing new, I feel that I am still struggling with things that even “beginners” must overcome. Perhaps it is that I am not training enough. Am I spending enough time in the climbing gym (or church)? Am I going out and practicing with other climbers (or believers)? Am I choosing to push myself to new levels or am I satisfied with where I am? Though the journey may leave me battered and bedraggled, I trust that the climb will be worth it; the view from the top will be spectacular.