Congratulations to Norman Van Eeden Petersman
December 6, 2006
Norman Van Eeden Petersman
…winner of the first annual Mars’ Hill short fiction contest.
RESOLUTION 2000
Chilled by the breeze that stirred the mid - December air, Dirk Jan van den Berg brought his leather-bound hands a little closer to his face and stepped off the bustling sidewalk into the Manhattan street. “I wonder how my family’s celebration of Sinterklaas Day was,” thought the mild-mannered UN Ambassador of the Netherlands.
It wasn’t easy being a diplomat in New York these days. Political tensions were running high; the massive cost overruns of foreign UN missions was having a huge impact on the efficacy of UN policies and it was becoming increasingly clear that a bold new approach was necessary. The past was not impressive and the future looked bleak. The UN was a sinking ship.
Of course, this didn’t change the fact that Dirk Jan must spend December in New York while the majority of his colleagues were enjoying themselves overseas with their families. He was, after all, the permanent representative of the Queen of the Netherlands in New York and, all things considered, it was a pretty awesome job. It’s just that he was missing out on the traditional Dutch holiday treats, the wonderful smells and sights of family dinners, and the general sincerity of religious observances that seemed to be altogether missing from an American practice of Christmas. “If I hear ‘ho-ho-ho’ one more time, I’ll do something drastic –maybe I’ll stop sponsoring my World Vision child or something like that,” he thought.
As he walked on, he gazed up at the stately Freedom Tower that loomed large in the distance. In a matter of years, his initial discomfort with the tower had been replaced with a grudging respect of a nation’s right to mourn a national tragedy in whatever way they chose. “It’s just so… so grotesque and phallic,” he thought as he passed it.
The UN Security Council, which included the Netherlands in its role as a rotating seat holder, would be dealing with Resolution 2000. It was a remarkable resolution, suggesting to the General Assembly that the United Nations be dissolved into five continental bodies with jurisdiction over each of those regions. Resolution 2000 had attracted a huge cry of protest from the left, the far right, the greens, the fems, the LGBTs, the pacifists – even the Mormons! It seemed that everyone actually cared about the UN after all.
Dirk Jan knew better though. His government, in coalition with three of the other non-permanent members of the Security Council, had led the charge to have the UN partitioned into regional blocks. It was about time, in Dirk Jan’s eyes. Deep in his heart, he knew that no one would miss the mismanaged, misguided, convoluted, and bureaucratically deadlocked global institution. In the end it would simply be left on the history books under the heading “failed international experiments,” with the equally dubious League of Nations. This Resolution 2000 was the culmination of 14 years of hard work for the Dutch, and Dirk Jan could feel that there was victory in the air. The British had finally assented to it (this new “Maggie Thatcher clone” was working out better than expected), the French had realized that the UN was no longer a priority in light of their newly sectarian government, and the Russians – well the Russians were waffling and likely to jump at any moment.
“I, Dirk Jan van der Berg, will go down in history as the small man from a small land who took a small plan to an enormous conclusion,” he thought to himself as he finally arrived at the UN complex. Maybe this would be satisfying for him after all.
Nothing could stop the momentum of the political juggernaut that had been launched, not even the Mormons, and he strode confidently into the office of the Secretary General of the United Nations.
“Merry Christmas Mr. Ban Ki-Moon,” Dirk Jan said softly as he broke the news to the SG that the Arab League and the Organization of American States had finally endorsed the Resolution.
“Never would I have thought that the UN would cease to exist in its current form,” said Mr. Ban Ki-Moon.
It was overwhelmingly obvious. The UN was one step away from being completely dismantled in favour of a regional bloc-style system. A striking conclusion to its history: the 2000th resolution, a milestone in diplomatic history was also the most crucial step towards convincing the General Assembly that the UN must go the way of the League of Nations and the Warsaw Pact.
After another 20 minutes of going over other matters, Dirk Jan returned to his lavish apartment in Manhattan, placed his head on the pillow, troubled only by the protrusion of the Mormon Bible that was buried under his mattress by a fundamentalist believer.
“History is created when small men from small places do small things which eventually become colossal moments of change,” he thought, and fell into a deep sleep.
Now you go...
One Response to “Congratulations to Norman Van Eeden Petersman”
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good story Norm.